Thankful

They say, people will forget what you did for them, what you said, and where you hung out, but that they will never ever forget how you make them feel.  But how do we make ourselves feel?

Feelings are tender, they get battered and bruised easily.  They need to be taken care of and looked after.  But how do we do this, when we are in pain or we are suffering.  How can we lift our heads, when the pain pierces so deeply?  Eternal questions, and I am not sure there is ever one answer that will completely satisfy everyone.

A few friends of mine are living in pain at the moment - the pain of loss, the pain of illness, the pain of diseased bodies, the pain of broken friendships, the pain of gossip - pain's that dig deep, pain's that make my heart cry for them.  When they share their thoughts with me, and their pain, I feel so honoured that they would share these secrets of the soul with me.  I often get asked a question - how did you get through it Nics?

You see, I too have lived with pain, a lot of pain.  In fact I see a whole decade in my life wrapped in a darkness so black, there are days I can't remember, because I was trapped in such agony.  That pain now thankfully has gone, and I am well, I am free, but I have a feeling or two as to what those who are in pain today go through.

My answer to that question would fill many blog posts - but one thing that I always share with people, is find a way to be thankful.  What an oxymoron, I hear you cry, how can you be thankful when you life is full of heaviness?  Well, I know that it seems strange, but when we go through tough times, if we can find something to be thankful for each day, it somehow, like a miracle, lifts us out of ourselves, out of our burden, out of our darkness, and gives us hope.

I encourage you to try it, even if you are not in pain - just living life - because trust me, I know that can be tough too.  There will be something, one thing that you are thankful for, all you have to do is look a little to find it.

Have a conversation around the dinner table, or with a pal, and say out loud, one thing that you are thankful for in the day that has just passed.  It could be a glass of water, a dramatic sunset, a tulip, a chat you had with a friend, a delicious dinner, a song you heard - the list goes on and on.  You might think right now, I have nothing to be thankful for, life is so terrible, but trust me here guys, you really do, just take a moment, even if it is something you think that is really inconsequential, just say it out loud, or note it down.

Get a notebook, put it by your bed, and just before lights out, each night, write down three things, that happened, that day, that you are thankful for. Keep those notebooks, read over them in years to come, they will make you smile, and they will show you how far you have come.

By making the decision to be thankful, we allow ourselves to hope again, to find life in darkness, to grow in the midst of our circumstances, and to find something to smile about, some colour, in the midst of what can often become a monotone world.  Let an attitude of gratitude allow you to spread your wings and fly.

Today, I am thankful for:

Having the opportunity to write this blog, and share conversation with you my readers

My friends - what an honour to know so many wonderful wonderful people

Dolly Parton - I just adore her music, her writing, her command of tone and her storytelling, right now as I write this, I am listening to this tune of hers 

Please do drop me a line and let me know what you are thankful for today...

Can't wait to hear from you, that's it for today...

Nics

salt and sparkle = life remarkable

Comments

[Linda James]

Many years ago, I was advised by a therapist to keep a thankful diary, and as you said, there were plenty of days I had to look very hard to find anything to be thankful for. Then I realised I hadn't really grasped properly what I was suposed to do, and that I was looking at the world through materalistic eyes. It was suddenly then that my eyes were truly opened, as if for the first time. I could be thankful for the most simple things, like a sunny day, seeing a robin, watching my dogs play. Years later I came upon one of these diaries while moving, and I saw as I moved through the pages, that over time the simple things, sometimes overwhelmed large events, and now I can see colour and beauty in things I never thought possible.

[Linda James]

Many years ago, I was advised by a therapist to keep a thankful diary, and as you said, there were plenty of days I had to look very hard to find anything to be thankful for. Then I realised I hadn't really grasped properly what I was suposed to do, and that I was looking at the world through materalistic eyes. It was suddenly then that my eyes were truly opened, as if for the first time. I could be thankful for the most simple things, like a sunny day, seeing a robin, watching my dogs play. Years later I came upon one of these diaries while moving, and I saw as I moved through the pages, that over time the simple things, sometimes overwhelmed large events, and now I can see colour and beauty in things I never thought possible.

[by Nics]

Linda, thank you for sharing those lovely words. It is really encouraging for me to read how having 'thankful diary' has been beneficial to you. You are so right, the simple things - the sun, a robin, birdsong, our dogs - bring so much light, and colour to our lives; they give us so much joy. I too have picked up old journals from year's ago, and smiled when I read the words that I had written. How the very small things made it possible to get through the very big, overwhelming things. Nx